I mentioned in this post about my not learning to swim being connected to body issues. As a really young child I don’t think I was aware of body size and shape. And frankly looking at pictures of me when I was a kid I was not fat at all.
Maybe, once I reached the teen years, I would say I was plump. Nothing drastic but enough to make me self conscious about bathing suits and shorts. I dreaded the summer and beach and pool parties. I wore a tshirt over my suit and basically stood in the pool or the ocean. There was no learning how to swim. Or even enjoying the water in a relaxing way. I know that this is unfortunately the reality for so many of us.
So the elation I felt after completing Jersey Girl on Sunday was just as much for getting through the swim as it was battling the feelings of insecurity as I wore my super tight compression shorts and tank…and have it cling even tighter after exiting the water! Sports Illustrated model I am not.
With running, I can get away most of the time wear a looser fitting top and capris and feel less anxious about the body issues. And frankly, running is my element anyway so the extra boost in confidence comes from that I suppose.
I’m writing this post mainly in the hopes that when y’all read this you remember that doing fun things and trying things out of your comfort zone doesn’t have to wait until you are a certain weight or size. I was actually so impressed with the Jersey Girl event on Sunday because it was an all women’s event and there were literally women of all shapes, sizes and ages. I encourage you all to say yes the next time someone asks you to do something you want to do but have fear about. I have heard my 14 year old niece talk about how fat she looks in a photo and it makes me so sad. She is long and lean and athletic and yet she focuses on the teeny tiny belly that appears when she sits. My goals and achievements and self-confidence is only going to give her one more role model in life. And THAT is extremely important to me.
OK enough of that soap box. =) Here are a couple more pics from Sunday.
So Thursday I got stranded after physical therapy because my Jeep decided to have a meltdown again. I basically divorced her at that very moment. Grabbed my bike out of the trunk (which had been in there since the race on Sunday!), my running magnets off the back and called my dad to come get me. Thank god he was home.
I needed to be somewhere that afternoon and literally had no time to wait for a tow. My sis-in-law has been letting me borrow her old car for the week which is great. I went back to the scene of the meltdown yesterday to wait for the tow truck and bring Lady Liberty back to the mechanic.
I was also supposed to be working and while i was able to complete some tasks remotely, there was one job that i couldn’t access files for so I ended up taking the train into the city.
While I was on the train the mechanic called to say they found nothing wrong with the car and i should pick it up. That’s not really the answer I wanted but whatever. It’s mysteriously working again and I’ll deal with picking it up later. Meanwhile, just before the train was ready to pull into the last stop it was held due to “police activity” at Penn Station and instead of arriving at 5PM I arrived at 5:45PM. I got to my office just before 6PM, banged out the work and then met up with my dear friend Donna for dinner at Mustang Harry’s (it’s on the same block as Mustang Sally’s and it’s BETTER!). I had not one but 2 glasses of sangria and in addition to my quesadillas I squirreled away some of Donna’s fries too. This was mainly because in the craziness of the day I barely ate.
Donna and I talk all the time on the phone and via text and email but it’s been quite a while since we have been together in person. I was so happy to see her face I cried. Then she cried. Then we laughed and caught up on life. It was the first time in 2 days I was relaxed enough to eat unabashedly.
I’m dog sitting today so it’s double the doodle fun.
And then I’m heading out to the Subaru dealership to hopefully buy a car.
Hope you are all having a great weekend!