I’m sorry I haven’t been posting much all week. I knew it would be a hectic one but it ended up being even more hectic than originally anticipated. I just got back from yoga and I’m feeling a bit calmer so I’ll fill you in on what’s been going on.

Duncan had some health stuff this week which I’m still dealing with. A small cyst on his outer eyelid got swollen and then burst and Tuesday morning it ruptured.

:(

:(

The vet gave me instructions to do warm compresses twice a day, apply ointment to the lid and then give him 2 different pills daily including a steroid. Then came the side effects and the overall stress and possible discomfort he’s feeling. Needless to say I’ve been a bit overwhelmed with it all. I can handle a lot but when he isn’t well I shut down. My shmoopsie poo….what can i say. I barely ate this week but when i did it was paw print pancakes. lol.

IMG_2286

pitiful

pitiful

I was happy when he was resting comfortably

I was happy when he was resting comfortably

sad sac selfie (me more than him!)

sad sac selfie (me more than him!)

My car went in for routine servicing this week as well and somehow, my luck it started to act weird after I got it back. Idling low and last night it practically stalled….the lights came on on the dashboard and then it lurched forward a couple of times. I’m going to bring it back Monday so they can take a look. Hoping they just have to make some adjustments to whatever they did.

And then I got swamped with work….which is good but stressful. I’ve got multiple new projects from one client that are all fairly fast paced as far as deadlines go so I’ve been working at night and in the early mornings to keep up.

And the only exercise I managed to get in this week was yoga on Monday and again today….oh and some whitewater rafting yesterday. Yep, in the midst of my crazy week I went with Mr. SOTSS and his girls for the day. I was home by 7pm and worked until 11pm.

relaxing in between rapids

relaxing in between rapids

And while we sat in traffic coming home we got to see this pretty lil rainbow

always a sucker for the 'bow

always a sucker for the ‘bow and the beau :)

Hoping next week is a little calmer.

Oh and my toe? Yep, slowly healing. 8 treatments of PT and still not walking 100 percent all day but wayyyyyy better than i’ve been I get about 15 minutes every morning where I feel 100 percent and then slowly as the day progresses I am reminded that the toe is still healing. I’m going to wait until Labor Day weekend (about a month from now) to decide if I’m ready for some short, easy running miles. But boy has it gotten easier to handle this non-running.

And last weekend I got to go to a balloon festival in Readington, NJ. IMG_2048

Unfortunately the winds were too high for the balloons to take flight but we got to see some hot air balloons filled up and looking pretty. It was a fun evening.

Wonder Bread balloon glowing.

Wonder Bread balloon glowing.

Angry Bird balloon overshadowing the Wonder Bread balloon

Angry Bird balloon overshadowing the Wonder Bread balloon

IMG_2073-retouched

Have you ever been in a hot air balloon? Would you want to?

What is the biggest “small stuff” stressor for you?

For me it’s my car and when my dog is sick. Both in one week!

 

My Running Motivation Contribution

Hi

Happy Thursday! I was asked to contribute a few tips for running motivation from the folks over at fittousBest-Tips-to-Maintain-Running-Motivation

You can read my tips and tips from 42 other bloggers over here. There are definitely some common themes! Hope you find it helpful. :)

In other news my latest yoga progress—after almost 3 months—I can now hold a wheel pose.

I never thought I'd be able to do this

Duncan waiting for the mat so he can practice his downward dog

I've also become the master of matching my yoga mat and being more flexible.....in life

I’ve also become the master of matching my yoga mat and being more flexible…..in life

And in doggie paddle news i’m up to 24 laps!

34 minutes in the pool = soggy toes.

34 minutes in the pool = soggy toes.

IMG_1768That’s 600 yards of low impact cardio for my entire body! And last night I went on a 4+ mile hike with very little issue from my toe. I’m slowly seeing the light at the end of the tunnel (the second time around!) and hope that I’ll be back to running in the fall.

Honestly....How can this view not affect your mindset

Honestly….How can this view not affect your mindset

Normally I don't like to take Duncan on the hikes in the summer but the weather was much cooler and I knew he'd be able to do it

Normally I don’t like to take Duncan on the hikes in the summer but the weather was much cooler and I knew he’d be able to do it

:)

:)

Ella who's only 6 months old joined our hike too! She's so adorable

Ella who’s only 6 months old joined our hike too! She’s so adorable

I’m just going to enjoy challenging myself to adding doggie paddle laps and trying to conquer yoga poses that seem so hard for me. Half moon: you’re next!

I’ve been enjoying picking fresh veggies in my dad’s garden. He’s got string beans growing up the corn stalks.

corn getting close to being ready for harvest

corn getting close to being ready for harvest

string beans!

string beans!

And here are a couple of additional Duncan photos just because:IMG_1730

Pondering life

Pondering life

Any running motivation tips to add?

Do you like string beans or corn?

Something about yoga and paying attention to song lyrics. I guess this is my new thing. Yesterday it was a Coldplay song….the lyrics that shouted at me were “Nobody Said it Was Easy”.

Speaking of Yoga, I saw this gorgeous rainbow after a class earlier in the week

Speaking of yoga, I saw this gorgeous rainbow after a class earlier in the week

It felt like some sort of validation or affirmation for me. Like I was being told it’s ok to struggle…nobody said it was easy….then I thought about all the things that “it” represents for me:

Work

Physical Healing

Emotional Healing

Life

I struggle daily to feel whole without running. I constantly want to put a disclaimer to every day that states “well today was hard because I can’t run”. When actually I should just accept today was hard because it was hard.

I’m working hard at building my freelance business. I’ve recently been certified as a New York City M/WBE (Minority/women owned business) and attended a networking/procurement event this past Wednesday in the city where I had the opportunity to talk to 70 NYC agencies who could potentially contract me to do work for them.

First let me say that it felt lovely to be reunited with my favorite commuting option....the Staten Island Ferry.

First let me say that it felt lovely to be reunited with my favorite commuting option….the Staten Island Ferry.

This required me to dig deep to give my “elevator pitch” to these agencies. I came home drained and while I wanted to feel optimistic about the potential opportunities, I felt overwhelmed from it all.

I feel so official with my badge

I felt so official with my badge

procurement-fair

Got some swag for attending which was nice. I have already used the ear buds.

Got some swag for attending which was nice. I have already used the ear buds.

I totally managed to recharge over the weekend though and that’s left me ready to tackle today.

Friday I drove out to visit a friend who I haven’t seen in a while. Her daughter is almost 6 and as adorable as ever. She heard me talking about my worry about finances and hoping I can get my business to make more money by finding some additional clients and gave me $5,000 in Post-It note currency…5grandWe played with Legos and even baked a cake in her LaLa Loopsy oven (like the Easy Bake oven).

Apron fashion and micro fashion :)

Apron fashion and micro fashion :)

Let’s just say the cake wasn’t such a success but we laughed and enjoyed the silliness of half uncooked-stuck to the pan cake crumbles sprinkled on top of some very weird tasting “frosting”. Sometimes it’s about the process and not the end result right? :) More »

The setback

So the setback specifically is in regard to my toe (shocker!). I thought I was being smart with my return to running but apparently there was a delayed response in tendon overload. I ran fine at the Spring Lake 5 miler on May 27th. I didn’t run again until almost an entire week later for just 3.5 easy miles. Again, no issues. Two days later I ran another 5 miles and I think that was probably where the overload came in because the next day I felt a smidge more achy than usual and literally each day this past week it got progressively worse until I found myself limping by the end of the week. So sneaky that toe! Needless to say I’m back on running hiatus. But I learned something here and I’ll use this setback as a reminder that even if I feel good one day after a run or even two I need to wait it out a little longer.

The progress

While the toe has had a setback, I’m happy to report that I’ve been making progress in a few areas.

1. Yoga Poses: I am getting better at crow! And, last night I realized that about 15 minutes into class I could touch my fingers to the floor during forward fold which I don’t think I’ve been able to do before (hello tight hamstrings!). I had a really awful time this weekend when my toe hurt so bad I was struggling to walk and I was at the Jersey Shore with Mr. SOTSS and his daughter. I didn’t want his daughter to see me cry but I was in such pain. I really just wanted to curl up with Mr. SOTSS and cry my eyes out and have him comfort me but obviously it wasn’t appropriate at the time. And I didn’t want to ruin a fun night since she doesn’t get to see her dad that much.

A fake smile as I limped along the beach with Mr. SOTSS and his daughter and a full moon.

A fake smile as I limped along the beach with Mr. SOTSS and his daughter and a full moon.

So the progress in yoga was a well-needed lift to my spirits. It’s empowering to try new things, stick with them and then see small improvements and progress. (I wish I could say the same for biking but we all know I never found my groove there). And now this brings me to #2 but first watch my shaky crow:

 

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Enjoying the last of the sunset from the window of the yoga studio

2. Mental Strength: Ok so this one was a huge aha moment for me last night at yoga. I’m gonna get a little deep here so bare with me. We were laying in Shavasana at the end of yoga class tonight and listening to the song “Awake My Soul” by Mumford and Sons. I felt so calm, so happy, so clear. This really sounds silly but I truly felt like I found a new way to soothe myself. A small choice to give yoga a shot in the midst of my toe injury depression has turned into 6 weeks of attending 2x a week and leaving class each and every time feeling not just good but great! My toe feels much better in the few hours after class, my core is getting attention after being ignored for so long. But most importantly my heart and my mind are getting a workout during practice that have their own “afterburn” effect.

Yay me!

Yay me!

I know you’re thinking “Um what’s the big deal? People do this every day.” Before my husband died (like a few weeks before he died….probably in March of 1999) I remember crying to my close friend when I thought about the inevitable funeral. Who would comfort me that day, because frankly the only person I wanted to comfort me would be him, but if he were laying in a casket that wouldn’t be an option now would it?! (side note: I read the book Option B, by Sheryl Sandberg recently and loved it because I could totally relate to so many things she said). Well, I survived not only the funeral but 15 years of widowhood (dating on and off but pretty much on my own) before meeting Mr. SOTSS. I learned how to comfort myself and pick myself up after every setback. I didn’t have a choice. It became something I was so proud of. And of course meeting friends like Lisa and beginning my journey into the running world only helped my mental game. A coworker once nicknamed me “the rock” because he was so impressed with how I kept moving forward. But something happened when I met Mr. SOTSS. Not right away because I still had my protective shell….but over the years I’ve started to rely on him more and more to help me with my moments of depression or anxiety. Don’t get me wrong, it’s wonderful to have a significant other who loves me and wants to comfort me in times of sadness but the more I rely on him and not myself the more I’m losing what I worked so hard to gain. Not to mention it really puts too much pressure on him because emotional support is not necessarily his strong suit…..he’s a dude and dudes are from Mars not Venus right? :) (Hi honey! Love you! ;)) Life is best lived in balance and I think 2017 is the year I’m learning this just a bit more. I’m learning to diversify! LOL! …adding yoga and hiking to my exercise passions. Adding a standing desk so I can balance the time I spend sitting while working. And now I can focus more on getting my own self through the tough times again like I used to.

However I don’t think I’ll ever be able to balance the amount of Duncan pictures I take. He’ll always be my muse and my biggest addiction :)IMG_0589

Question 1: When you are overwhelmed, depressed or anxious do you tend to reach out to others to help you keep moving forward or do you like to find your own path?

Question 2: Have you been dealing with a recent setback or discovering progress in something in your life?