So, I had a little meltdown in my car yesterday afternoon when I tried to run a couple of miles for the first time in a month and the knee didn’t approve nor did it improve. How could 4 weeks of rest go by without ANY improvement? (apparently I’m really stubborn and not listening to my “Time and Rest heal everything” advice) Other than my day of skiing 3 weeks ago I haven’t done any cardio. Tears were shed…

tears

is it weird that in the midst of crying I needed to document it with a photo?

Don’t feel bad for me. It’s totally not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. It’s my own personal struggle and I’m going to have to dig deep to keep myself sane.

I wanted to write this post giving you the play by play of how the knee gave way only 24 minutes into the run. I wanted to tell you all about how frustrated and sad I am…

treadmill

Happy feet for about 20 minutes

treadmill

a 13 minute mile and an 11:30 minute mile….then a meltdown.

After collecting myself I drove straight to Trader Joe’s to get some groceries and get my mind off of things. While I was there these yellow roses just asked to come home with me. I literally stopped to smell the roses.

IMG_3388

TJ haul

IMG_3389

These chips cheered me up on the drive home

roses

stop and smell the roses

And by the time I came home I had one of those talks with myself in the shower. It went something like this: Sally, don’t focus on what you can’t do right now. Focus on what you CAN do.

I can walk
I can hike
I can (probably) bike (I’ll check this out next week on a recumbent bike at the gym)
I can play fetch with my dog (using my left arm).
I can hug my boyfriend (although until the shoulder heals I have to wrap my arms around his waist rather than up by his neck. But this will be a goal I set when I start PT =)
I can spend quality time with my friends
I can spectate at races
I can do stretching and strengthening exercises for my hips, quads and glutes
I can make people laugh.
I can give great advice

I am tough. I’m not weak. I’m also clumsy and accident prone =)

tough times

I will last forever

Then, I outlined the following:

From 1973 to 2005 I wasn’t a runner (well, I was on the track team in high school for a semester but I hated it and quit so I don’t really count it.)

A knitter, not a runner

A knitter, not a runner

A cute 1st grader but not a runner

A cute 1st grader but not a runner

A dancer, not a runner

A dancer, not a runner

High School hair

High School hair

From 2006-2011 I went from barely being able to run a mile to running a full marathon. Thank you Lisa! I found myself through all those years of miles…and I found a way to solidly handle my grief and loss that I had been trying to keep a handle on for a good 6 years prior.

1st marathon! 2011

1st marathon! 2011

3rd Half marathon 2009

3rd Half marathon 2009

From 2011 to now I have completed a total of 5 marathons, 27 half marathons and over 40 other races including 4 Ragnar Relays.

Running the 2014 NJ Marathon

Running the 2014 NJ Marathon

I have learned about being an injured runner. I have come back from 3 separate ankle injuries, hamstring issues and shin splints…and I will come back from whatever the eff this knee thing is.

On a side note, my shoulder is improving slightly. I still have limited range of motion and can’t really carry anything too heavy but the aching soreness has really gone away in the last few days. I will have my MRI in 3 more days and I’m looking forward to starting physical therapy next week for it. I’m also going to get that doc on the horn and ask him to give me a separate referral for my knee. It’s time to get an official diagnosis.

Switching gears…

This morning my running peeps came from the Bronx and Brooklyn to run the Cold Feat 10k trail run (check out my recap of last year’s race here) that’s just 10 minutes from my house. (I sat it out since the knee just wasn’t ready for prime time).

running peeps and me

running peeps and me

And they're off...

And they’re off…

cheese!

cheese!

Go Lisa Go!

Go Lisa Go!

Mike bringing it home!

Mike bringing it home!

before the race

before the race

Yep, that's me with my attempt at straightening my curls...

Yep, that’s me with my attempt at straightening my curls…

Oh, and let me just say that Lisa and Mike are total logistics rock stars. They ran a 4 mile race in Brooklyn at 8am….then hopped in the car and drove to Staten Island for the Cold Feat 10K arriving with 20 minutes before the 10am start! That’s 10 miles in 2 boroughs.

double bibs and look at the similarities in their numbers!

double bibs and look at the similarities in their numbers!

We love logistical challenges. Back in 2013 we ran 5 marathons(I did the half) in 5 states in 5 days.

After the race we all came back to my house for brunch. I love that they come here every year. 3 years running so far! Seeing them was just what I needed to lift my spirits. And now I’m sitting on the couch with my necessities for a cozy evening while the snow falls outside.

Doodle TV

Doodle TV

Have you ever done a trail race? With snow?

Do you love annual traditions?

What are the catalysts to get you to turn your frown upside down?
For me? My friends, Duncan, flowers, carbs and of course Mr. SOTSS….he’s been such a huge reason i can’t stay sad for long.

 

 

8 Comments

  1. :) Cheers to a positive attitude. It was a great morning as usual! Looking forward to the next million more.

  2. Meltdowns make us so human. Even though right now might be a huge struggle I honestly believe you will come back a better runner. Somebody told me that when I was on crutches and a thigh to ankle brace and at the time I really thought they epwere trying to make me feel better as I was so down. I have come back a stronger runner and in the journey of injury I also learnt so much about myself. I didn’t real use it disputing the 9 months of recovery but it was clear once I was running again.

    Stay strong and dig deep, it will all help you in the long run. And you’re allowed to have tough days so don’t be hard on yourself. Thinking of you :)

  3. I so get the frustration. I’ve struggled with the dreaded Achilles monster and it does really break you down. But I agree, staying positive, strong in your healing faith and not going down the dark road will be what gets you through. I hope you feel better soon.

  4. Oh, man…All running injuries deserve a few tears, and long-term ones deserve a few more. I had a knee injury back in 2010 that knocked me out for almost 6 months, so I totally get your frustration. Eventually all the PT exercises and time off from running did pay off, though I still have trouble in that spot to this day and have to stay one top of the strength training. Oh, the things we do to keep running!

    Anyhow, kudos to you for staying positive – you WILL get through this and add plenty of new race experiences to that impressive list of yours. I truly believe that positivity helps the body heal, so keep that chin up! Whenever I’m feeling down, I gather my 8 and 10 year old girls up for a little girl time at our local frozen yogurt place : ) Giggling girls + yummy treats = instant happiness!

    Oh, and I had to laugh…I was a one-semester track dropout in high school, too, and I’m pretty sure I had exactly the same hairdo in 1992 (though mine was courtesy of a spiral perm and gallons of Aqua Net).

  5. Focusing on what you can do instead of what you can’t do is definitely going to help you deal with the injuries! Sorry your knee still isn’t up to par. Hope you feel better soon!

  6. Pingback: Shoulder MRI and the last couple of days -

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